episode 1: she/her

this was my "maybe they won't notice" phase. being diagnosed with something as ugly sounding as ~schizophrenia~... I HAD to over compensate with unparalleled external beauty. I imagined girls I'd be attracted to--femme cuties with soft lips. I BECAME THAT PROJECTION. i wanted to be in control of how i was perceived by others, prob a reaction to my brain chemicals making me feel so out of control. was i happy? no. but did I look happy? Yes! So boom, all good!

"she/her" by vitakari (2022)