From the Corner Machine: Dreaded Pirate's Strawberry Cider

This be arrgh, a cider for drinkers who prefer anything but ciderrrrr. Our grog is made by me very hands after a long day of toiling as a farmerrrrr. I pick the heartiest of strawberries to make this here fine brewwwww. You'll like it... or else... I give ye you're monies back.