no5ay_: Disgrace To My Dad

Disgrace To My Dad by Daniel Jerome NO5AY_ collection 2022 4000x5000, 300ppi.PNG 02/13/22 - 02/15/22 digital abstract neo-expressionism art

I manage to try to make every piece personal in a sense, this one definitely came from a place of anger & frustration. Without over explaining my art, my dad is not terrible. It's just my dad had his childhood, took care of my family whilst majority of his time spent in military, which that kind of mindset was brought home (in relation to any other parents in military bringing kind of strict discipline to their kids growing up). I do believe a lot of my insecurities & upbringing was molded by his strictness & expectations, so even now at 30 it affects me. I'm not used to ideas like telling my dad "love you" or giving him hugs. So after the incident that triggered this, creating this was the perfect way for me to handle our interaction. It's something I try to iron out through therapy often & get deep into my self-esteem/confidence. Normally I'd share more stories, maybe the exact incident that brought this expression out...but I know there is many more expression to be had portrayed through my work. A lot of perspective just coming from my own life so..a bit afraid of being redundant. But to end this description, very grateful for this type of visual medium. During my time dancing & creating choreography, a lot of that was still based on personal life..love, self-confidence, the fight for feeling whole...but this kind of work I feel I am able to elaborate & be more specific a lot more often. It's really relieving for how I was feeling when creating. Again, I love my dad, in no way is this anything against him, just a conflicting feeling I've always felt while growing up, I always felt against the expectations..not even with family, but the world in general. Whether it be career path, personality, etc. Forever loving & grateful to art.