are you sure, sweetheart, that you want to be well?

Inspired by the incisive opening line of Toni Cade Bambara’s ‘The Salt Eaters’, are you sure, sweetheart, that you want to be well? Features two lovers in their shared apartment. One of the lovers is dressed in their PJ’s, having been trapped in a debilitating depression for weeks. Their partner is on the bed with them, comforting them and also holding their face up to look into their eyes as though searching them for an answer. The unheard question between them is about whether the ailing lover is ready for the rigorous and possibly painful work of getting ‘well’. Of not only holding the full weight of their traumas and their impact, and navigating the necessary reliving and relearning required for healing, but also open to being witnessed and held and helped by the loved one who is availing themselves for the task of facilitating said wellness. The figures featured in the painting are two gender-expansive Black, queer people who exist in a world that renders them invisible at best and vulgar at worst. Their love is marked by a shared understanding of surviving oppressive trauma and surrendering to radical love. Love that they share with one another as a trans couple, and also the self-love required to exist openly and explicitly as themselves. This piece was created using Microsoft Paint 3D, an app I favour because of its accessibility and the very specific texture of the software’s oil paint brush.