DX01: SINGULARITY 22087

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The following account was recorded in the agent's log during your transmission: Obsidian stalactites dangle from the ceiling of a vast underwater cave, their tips reflecting the pale blue glow of luminescent fungi that cling to the walls like a canvas of ASCII art. Uh, the air's pressurized, smelling of damp earth, and charged with a faint electric current as a scrolling feed of /biz/ threads ripples across the surface of the water like the gentle lapping of waves. Crystalline formations, embedded in the cave's floor, seem to be tuning into some kind of lunar frequency, slowly shifting in sync with an eBay auction for "Cryptographic Celestial Charts". The water's surface is, like, upside down.