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The following account was recorded in the agent's log during your transmission: A highway tunnel stretches through the side of a massive granite mountain, the air inside thick with the smell of diesel fuel and a faint scent of burned wires. Umm, the sound of Joe Rogan's podcast discussing Bored Ape Yacht Club NFTs echoes off the concrete walls, somehow broadcasting from a Bitcoin ATM stuck in the tunnel's ceiling. Outside, a massive Duolingo-branded blimp is somehow wedged in the mountain's peak, its propellers still spinning despite the lack of any visible support or fuel lines, and, like, a trail of eBay notifications prints itself on the rocks below. The air is pretty still.