Thinking quickly, I ...

Thinking quickly, I fashioned a crude gorilla costume from the shredded bark of a hairy mango tree. I donned the costume and began making amorous monkey sounds while gyrating in a most provocative way. The beast saw my display and immediately dropped the aboriginal pack carrier he was probing and sat mesmerised as I finished my show. Before the beast regained his senses, I seized two large stones, approached quickly and forcefully struck them together with the unfortunate ape's testicles in between. For the remainder of our journey, the gorilla carried our supplies, cooked our meals and swept up the campsite after our departure.