The Cycloptic Conundrum Cane, aka Britney

An ancient staff of unknown origin, wielded by the mighty Crucifore.

Affectionately named Britney, this staff has the ability to harness rare magic and grants +1 DMG to all reptilians. However, she can be quite temperamental and is known to summon out-of-date snacks when attempting necromancy.

Legend has it that with every spell cast there is a 3% probability a vortex will open and devour the entire universe for lunch, leaving only darkness and the faint sound of Nickelback’s greatest hits.