Maybe

A Visual Spoken Word Poem called Maybe:

We typically aren’t actually the people we disguise behind. 100% openness and honesty can be a double edged blade, that will leave you severely hurt, or in a place of ecstasy. It’s not a spectrum most people are comfortable with living with. So, naturally we feel the need to shut off eccentric parts of ourselves for the comforts of others.

And as we keep growing and learning, we find more and more parts to shutdown, Because we simply don’t trust ourselves or judgement. Everyone wants to find a place in the center of that spectrum, Complacency, comfortability, sustainability. And this is the saddest thing of all to me.

Having never really lived a life where openness and honesty could come easy for me, Now that I've come from some help with mental health recovery. It’s all I aim to be. To everyone I see or speak with, they will get to know me for better or for worse. I’ve been hidden so long that I’ll probably come off as a needy kid, striving for attention. But I am sure as this continues, I will be forced to learn the eccentricities in which to mask.

Will this just be another cycle of a late social bloomer that slowly unravels back to a place of hiding? Maybe, But I hope not.