Dear friend,
At times I find myself reflecting and ruminating on how quickly time passes by. How swiftly it passes me by-- it passes us by.
I get amazed at how in the beginning of every year, we make plans, we plot vacations, we schedule so much- or maybe the opposite, we don’t get into the details but somehow there are expectations as to what the year could bring. Could this be the year I save more money? Or lose more? Could this be the year I settled down or experience more heartbreaks than I can manage? Could this be the year I start that business? Or travel to the country I’ve been dreaming of visiting? Could this be the year I’d be finally set free of my anxiety?
And then somehow, somewhere along the way it almost, always never turns out the way you expect things to be—not the same as what you’ve imagined it when you were writing your yearly goals, not the same as you’ve dreamt it could be—but there are times that it does exceed your expectations.
Then you sit in quiet awe and gratitude as you reflect on all the remarkable things that have happened-that for sure, and in no way, you could have manipulated happening. Yet somehow you became a part of- whether you had a positive perspective or narrative in that context or threw in your share of doubt, immersed yourself in fear and allowed questions to tangle your inner thoughts. You’re here now. You made it.
It’s compounding- all these little acts that you’ve done- the work you’ve put in in the daily hustle; the energy you’ve invested even in the mundane. And you think it’s usually the heavy, and impactful moments that make the mark- yes, and maybe they do sometimes—but it’s those small things, the daily disciplines. The things you keep doing everyday (even when you don’t feel like it) that contributed to improving your work ethic. It’s in the routine you try to maintain to make sure you don’t fall back into the heavy arms of anxiety. It’s those words you tell yourself to cheer your own spirit- you become your own wingman first- before you become another’s cheerleader. And you know that you know it has never been easy- and it probably won’t become easier the coming year, but there’s this still, small voice telling you to keep going anyway, to keep doing these daily habits, and encouragements--anyway.
You did your part. You put in the work. You sent that email. You submitted that artwork. You tried selling. You sold. You’re waiting for it to get sold. You bought your friend’s work. You made friends. You cooked that recipe you saved in your Instagram saved posts- finally. You saved money. You lost some. You won some. You cried. Many, many tears. You laughed – joyful, fun laughter. You played the game. You replied to that message. You sang that song. You danced to Beyonce. You drove to see that view. You grieved. You celebrated. You wrote that book. You traveled. You stayed. You let go. You forgave. You gave. You kept on giving. You loved. And you never looked back.
I deeply believe in the core of all this, somehow and in some way, you have become your own gift- to the people around you, to your friends, family, significant other- you gave the gift of presence. You gave yourself-- however that looked like or felt like. And at times you may feel you’ve given only pieces of yourself but if you look at it in a different light you gave everything you could—broken but you gave all.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank YOU.
This coming new year, may you consider going the narrow way of love and still choosing to be the bigger person when circumstances require it of you. May you keep saying “yes” to whatever serves your “why” and courageous enough to say “no” when need be.
May the coming year be your best year yet.