Corrupted Memories

Corrupted Memories comes from my own experience of long term memory loss and the ever looming feeling of fear that one day ill never remember anyone or anything. Every day is a struggle for me to gather myself in the morning and hold on to what I am supposed to do moving forward when the next day comes. I feel as if there's another me inside my head that takes over from time to time, with gaps in my days or weeks. A constant weight of anxiety making me feel inhuman when others ask me to remember something when in my head that experience is gone. Its been erased, corrupted or written over like a hard drive with manufacturing fault in it. No matter the size of the data small or large the experience can just seize to exist, it can be terrifying at times especially when you watch the world around you continue to move forward in time living normal lives till they've run their course. But for me? No, I have the unfortunate blessing that I not only get to see it happen around me but also feel it happen. And when you try to call back to pull that data that was once there sometimes you end up experiencing something that didn't actually happen, being fed bytes of data from those around you that share the real experience so the brain tries to perform recovery but ends up meshing the wrong data together or rebuild a false memory. Its terrifying but the lack of these memories do bring a light to enjoy the moments I have, in the moment while its happening.

Because I never know if ill remember it or if it will become ċ̶̢̯̪̜̭̖̼̱̰͖͓̙͂̌̿̌͌̿̌̆́̀͊̐͝ò̸̡̧͍͎͓̗̜̙̞̼̭͖̲͆͌̔̽̂̽̀͂̕ͅr̷̹͓̻̟̦̜͉̘̺̝͖̟͎̹̘͗r̷̜͚̅̔̒̈́̋͊̓̇́̂͒͌̓͘ǔ̵͈̭̔͋̊̚p̸̘̦̦̫̖̟̻͉̗̹̘͉͙̯̏̆̅̿͋̔͛̌͝ţ̸̲̥̞̖̘̟̙̙͈͉̔́͆̓̓̌̍́̑͒e̵̢̨̢̛̯͍̙̩͕͍̼̳͍̻̽̇̂̃͛͘ḓ̴̩̄̔͠